Day 263

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to deny the value of applying myself consistently to the things that facilitate change the fastest and the most effectively even when those things seem menial, trivial, or a waste of time in comparison to other things and within that not acknowledging and realizing that even though these things may seem small or menial , if i am being absolutely honest with myself i know that these things have worked for me in the past and have supported me in taking on the bigger seemingly more poignant or important things that need to be taken care of which also seem as more challenging not realizing that obviously the small and menial things that i have disregarded are obviously just as much if not more challenging and poignant evidenced by the fact that i have not been able nor proven to myself that i can take on these menial points with consistency and diligence.

I forgive myself that i have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, take into account, and understand that if i start with the small and menial things and prove that i can tackle these things with prudence and consistency over a period of time that this can stand as the evidence or the blueprint of the how, why, where, when, and what i take on as the bigger things, utilizing the small evidence as a map or guide to taking on the big potentially in the same manner.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to disregard the relevance and importance of the small and seemingly menial things in the totality of my existence, not realizing that essentially the nature of the relevance of these in comparison to the bigger exemplifies the nature of equality and that only my mind can diminish or separate itself and me from the relevance of both as equal through compartmentalizing these surface illusions as what is relevant rather than understanding what is relevant in between above below and underneath it all.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to disregard the nature of equality in its flow and presence and not investigate the reality of what it means how it works and how that coincides with the shapes and forms for which it presents itself within and not investigate how my preprogrammed mind is predisposed to fixate itself on the variances of the shapes and forms rather than the principle architecture operating underneath these presentations or mediums.