Tonight has been very soothing and calming. It rained most of the night. At some point my experience changed from being really pissed off having all sorts of nasty thoughts to being peaceful and serene and it seemed like maybe it was after a couple of good tips and during/while it rained. I could feel this like urge and drive for expression - to have fun with others. I delivered one pizza where there were some people around my age drinking, partying, and smoking stuff. One was a cute girl with long brown hair - definitely the type of girl I would want to know and become friends with. There was an element of feeling like I'm missing that connection with people and especially the female part of it.
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