Friday, November 24, 2017

Day 212

Today has been fairly interesting. My partner is going through morphine withdrawals due to her pump going out without being refilled and the alarm system not alerting her that it was empty so she has been in a lot of pain and experiencing alot of nausea and sickness as a result.

So that's been pretty stressful to deal with at times. We've sort of been bumping heads the last few weeks due to that and other circumstances which have been catalysts for conflict and or masks for a different issue or so I assume some of the issues may be diverted to other points to avoid confronting the main issue or primary points that exist as points of friction or a sort of dissatisfaction regarding.

So within this framework I need to take responsibility for the acceptance of such designs as a part of my resonance - because that which I allow is that which I become equal to - thus the only way to stop and change that which I have allowed myself to accept as a part of my resonance - is to take responsibility for why it was accepted knowing it to be a lesser version of myself by means of presenting this point through the resonance design of one close to me day to day.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that accepting limitation and lesser versions of oneself that do not serve my utmost potential is a part of walking the system in self responsibility - within the idea that one must go through the system and or accept certain aspects of the system in order to survive - not realizing that this only affirms a predesign that is actually based in limitation and thus acceptance of these ideas which compells one to accept lesser versions of themselves as a means to ensure a particular survival or acceptance within the system - so that one can be at the headst of the opportunity of creating manifesting and designing the world in the image and,likeness of what is best for all - within that framework not realizing that this acceptance of lesser is the same means by which the collective structural resonance of the human being has come to accept lesser versions of themselves accumulatively into a design that condones limitation as if this was necessary or truth in the first place - within that not realizing that the ultimate truth of who each one is does not condone limitation or a lesser version of oneself as a means to fit in with the structural design of the human that exists in limitation - when the entire goal and process of equality is to realign ones acceptance and allowance as that which becomes their structurally resonant design into a a complete version of what is best for all overcoming all limitations and rules of the system that do not serve ones grand purpose of structually amalgamating with that which is besf for all.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed the fear of the reality or dynamics of acceptance and allowance because I know that things that I am allowing are not what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the fear of being trapped within the paradigm of the rules of acceptance and allowance within the context of close personal relationships because I am automatically committed to that which they accept and allow as that which they are accepting and allowing within themselves and others - and within that fear that real points such as financial situations and obligations would force me to submit to their point of view because at some point I allowed myself to depend on that person financially to meet my obligations - thus being trapped within their reality of acceptance and allowance as their resonance - thus being limited by their levels of common sense, their application towards change, and their awareness of how this all works.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and,allowed the fear that I will not be able to support myself in the event that I lose or give up on, and or am resonantly possessed to stop that relationship, or see that that which is best for all would entail ending it and would actually mean that I would have to suffer in some way because of losing the support I have received from that person of which in a way has become a trap of,dependence, and thus has automatically lowered me into a position of being inferior and thus subject to their resonance by means of dependence regardless if they're designing themselves into something better and more aware or not - thus leaving me with the likelihood of accepting further limitation or even abuse because my livelihood as money has been melded with theirs.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that which I accept and allow in another is also that which I accept and allow within myself.

I forgive myself thar I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that my potential and awareness is based on the potential and awareness of another whenever the relationship has become in any way a financial depedence on another in order to ensure survival.

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