Day 199

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed the fear of failure to constantly drive me to seek someone in my family especially my mother and or brothers to save me or bail me out of my financial condition.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the fear that if I were to fail that it would be the end and if I were to end up homeless then I would have lost my life, and I would never cone back from it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that failure is the end and to have no money would be the end not realizing that it is only the beginning.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed the belief that I must rely ob others for money not realizing that as long as I do I will never be free and learn to use my skills knowledge aptitude and abilities to make my destiny.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that my mother and father are simply designed to keep me from ever making any mistakes or failing so that I would never learn from them which in affect is keeping me trapped in a loop of dependence that is based in fear not practical reality because mistakes are what makes you learn.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed the fear of cutting all ties with family with my mother and father and create my own life which would allow me to essentially expand mysekf my awareness and my capabilities practically in reality.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed the fear of heeding the call of life to explore and to create without dependence on others ever again.

Good riddance. Till here no further. Fuck you mom and dad.